META PROGRAMS : The credit for inspiring me and giving the concept to work on this goes to Eric Robbie – in July 2005 in Mexico on Master Prac course he only mentioned Meta Programs Accessing Cues and I thought – WOW. It absolutely was type of the feeling psychologists get once they discover fast phobia cure – they go, “Hey!! We can do it in five minutes as opposed to 10 years!!”. I definiately wasn’t the greatest fan of Meta Programs – I knew they were important, but recognizing them linguistically felt like lack of time; I never found a trainer who congruently was always able to utlize them. Then there clearly was the proven fact that what’s more important than Meta Programs themselves is the sequence of them – I believed that worked better, since never in my entire life did I find anyone who would will have this particular MP or other – too often they were used as as merely another way of categorizing people.
Let`s say there`s a polarised person and they will do just the opposite to what you say and do. If you wanted to recognize this Meta Program verbally – you would need more hours and risk more. You come as much as anyone, say: “I’ve this contract for you”, and what they do inside their head has already been against everything you are planning to achieve – it`s too late. What you were after was saying: “Probably you wouldn`t be interested in this” – they do the opposite, there you go. The question is – how would guess what happens to say? The notion of accessing Meta Programs non-verbally opened many doors. First, you don`t have to ask – you merely know before they open their mouth. Second, I noticed a standard misconception that MP`s deal mainly with language – I believe they do, but my guess it they’re far more behavioural then linguistic.
Contemplate it – compare a couple, one motivated towards, one motivated away from. Look at the way they move when discuss their goals. Just how a procedure person gestures. Just how a reactive person discusses you. Just how I have now been discovering every one of these basically comes down to three stages – initially for a few weeks I would compare within my head bahaviour, voice and looks of the people I know have this or that MP. This might give me some idea how they differed. This also lead me to good conclusions – obviously MP`s come in different “sizes and shapes”, but there have been many coomon features too. Then I would practise – assess MP`s of a person before I started talking to them and later verbally check my predictions. Finally – and this text is the result of this– on my last Master Prac In Warsaw, Poland, I gave my students a particular task which took us two full days. Effects were astonishing and very creative. I gave all them a page which looked the manner in which you view it here:
- REPEATED WORDS GRAMMAR STRUCTURES VOICE BODY GESTURES
- FACE SUBMODALITIES INTERNAL DIALOGUE KINESTHETICS
- OTHER
On a flipchart, so that everyone could see, I put a list of 15 most popular MP`s. It stayed there for a few days, during which I would nest many stories, refer in their mind from time to time and point in a humorous way to some bahaviours of my students within the seminar which defined certain sort of MP. To paraphrase, I used to be preparing them for a vacation so they really practically realised what MP`s were about. Then the afternoon came and I handed them the sheets you will notice above. I diveded them in categories of three and gave every one a task. The earliest person was to “have” a clear MP. To paraphrase I figured you can inform someone to generally be as an example a proactive type and so they will.
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I gave them new temporary identities. And I hoped that anything else – bahaviour, beliefs, intonation and voice, vocabulary, the way of talking, possibly even some reinterpratation of values – would follow; and my predictions were right. Call someone a hunk regardless of the they appear like, cause them to become believe inside and there you go. It does work. This proved also, though they didn`t realise that quickly, that the way I did it presupposed that MP`s could be changed – when you can have got given in a physical exercise and congruently “function” by it, then obviously it teaches that you may choose which you wish to have and when. The second person was normally the one starting a conversation – we chose quite simple stuff, like going out together, planning which movie to find out etc. – this part failed to matter.
The third person was to see the two – not say a thing, just see, hear and feel. After like 5-minute conversation Specialists all these phones quietly fill the sheet because of their observations. Notice – the process I did three different perspectives, since website was “me”, another “you”, and the 3rd one “they&rdquo ;.When these were done Specialists these phones compare individual observations within the group and notice that which was similar. We would carry out the doing the laundry me and compare what all groups had – notice similarities, agree congruently using what was there and earn conclusions. This information is the effect of whatever we did. Possibly, I decided ten categories to concentrate on. A variety of them in common situations failed to end up being useful – in other business owners these were crucial.
- Repeated words obviously dealt with the information these were saying. With regards to the exercise which mainly did with non-verbal part, words used were not really much important, and these were an obvious consequence of other observations. You might predict what the individual was going to say according to other things. However, useful.
- Grammar structures played natural part in a few cases – especially proactive/reactive MP`s. We also paid attention which MP was more asking than stating or negating.
- Voice was absolutely crucial – we dedicated to intonation, speed, pace and various submodalities.
- Body treated posistion, which sometimes presupposed internal mechanisms. Obviously if you have a one who sits bending down, head down, shoulder slack, they can be bahaviorally proesupposed in making small pictures close to their heads – if the floor blocked towards you so does one!!
- Gestures with myself always helped to uncover submodalities – they would frequently draw facing my eyes, point where Internal Dialogue was out of or where things were. In this case classes online true.
- Face manufactured of greater than 80 muscles working together – in communication it reflects very much, that Seen people underestimate its rich meaning. Many times they would frequently say “there`s something in the face which tells me this…” etc. without to be able to precisely state the thing it was. Interestingly, this came about here too.
- Submodalities were mainly accessesed by Eric`s SMEAC`s – we dealt with considerations, like sizes, numbers, shapes, colours, distance, leaving some less important aside. Association and dissociation in a great many situations was crucial.
- Internal dialogue was crucial – we treated it as being basically internal equivalent of external voice, just that ID wouldn`t be heard for the is definiately primary to external voice. We paid special focus on intonation patterns and content of the thing it said.
- Kinesthetics is dependent on just what 1st, 2nd and 3rd person were feeling. We described and categorized it (“relaxed”, “tense” etc.) and not just described submodalities
- Other was the pot for anything else that found our heads
The subsequent will be description one’s observations and conclusions – in no way do I claim their email list is exhaustive or always works – what`s more, I`m absolutely positive there`s a lot more to uncover and uncover that case a peak of your iceberg. I chose problems that worked for people like us, avoided mind reading and speculating what “could be” there, just focused the amount we saw, heard and felt without interpreting it. E-mail me ([email protected]) with your thinking and feedback, Meta Programs Accessing Cues is a great thing to improve also it can move us much forward with our learnings and teachings.
Proactive and Reactive MP
Active type is a leader – he chooses lots of the decisions himself, often basis on internal standards and authority. He makes use of first person singular (“I”) or plural (“We”). His sentences are semantically well-formed with absolutely characteristic entry to active voice. He speaks fluently, confidently, specifically. Body position suggests self-confidence, he plants himself often, head and shoulders straight up. Deep breathing. Makes big, often panoramic pictures, 3D, vety often associated – this influences his kinesthetics, because Active`s are who gesture, move, switch their position often. He leads even more than paces.
A minimum of internal dialogue, if that’s so – almost never anything verbalised, rather silent subconscious intonation patterns like – “mmmmmmmm”, which strenghten his state and power of persuasion. His chunks up and not just down and moves to options and not just procedures. – Reactive type avoids responsibility and might be more more likely to feel guilty. He basis on external standards and authority. Wants decisions to be produced and not making them. Crucial entry to passive voice – “it has to be done”, “it must”, “one should&rdquo ;.Asks many questions (rather than states statements) , because prefares in the event the answers originated from different sources than himself. Interestingly, when he will be asked to perform or decide, often he should go into “don`t want to” or “confused what to do” states.
Uses obligation (“must”, “have to”) and necessity (“should”), which automatically makes him motivated in away from manner. A lot of internal dialogue searching content-wise for answers and installing doubt. Many small pictures without specific content, often blurred, moving around. Dissociates himself, helping to make sense with his behaviour – he sees himself in situations as marionette and subject of decisions rather than supply of them. “Placetor” in Satir categories – pleads, apologises, takes guilt, is sorry. He may be tense often, face expresses anticipation.
Motivation Towards and Away From
Motivated towards are easy to spot – they state things in positive and avoid nagation. The crucial point is which they like the items they “want”, not “should” or “must&rdquo ;.This difference is vital – motivated towards chooses a corrot and dislikes the stick. His voice is frequently excited, more stimulating and confident. He is able to “turn on” like madcap, shows his emotions, experiences externally, enjoys more. In non-NLP language he`s an optimist, what’s obviously linked to “positive” submodalities he`s making – tons of pleasant colors and a lot of brightness. The larger how big is the picture, the more “turned on” they will be. They “haven’t any time” for ID, if it`s there in hardly ever verbalized, rather switches into intonation patterns which enrich their states.
A lot of eye movements moving in different directions, often jumping from an image to picture or seeing a huge, panoramic one. A lot of gestures, used to desribe and emphasise submodalities. They smile a great deal – contemplating nice feeling they will have which originates from the picture they make simply makes them feel good. A loop is done – picture makes them feel good, kinesthetic reaction is evoked, helping to make the submodalities more intense, which influences kinestehtics and so on. Motivated away from – this type avoids bad experiences. Often they choose obligation (“have to” and “must”). Sentences are well chosen and thought over; logical, rational computer. Often they provide reasons why.
Pictures are dark compared with towards motivation and dominated by black, grey, dark green, blue colours (they may even say this verbally, like “ I have dark considered this). These are rather movies, usually with unpleasant ending. Doesn`t smile too much. Face is darker, greyish, after years with increased wrinkles and lips curling down. They choose “what if” frequently and polarise from what people say. The emotion that they get when halucinated evil doesn`t happen is a comfort – which can be a typical example of stick motivation. They explain themselves with “I want to avoid the worst” when calles pessimists. A lot of ID with horrible intonation. Characteristic, if they walk or move they often lose rhythm and fluency – I think it`s because of internal incongruence (he rushes to work in order to avoid his boss scolding him, helping to make him feel bad and it influences his “flow”). I think – and it’s my guess – that these individuals die from heart attacks more than anyone else. Funny, I also think there are many men motivated away from than women. Voice is frequently sad, disappointed, worried.
Internal and external standards
– Internal standards and authority – he believes his assessments and judgements more compared to others. Often polarised from what others say, especially when concerns himself to own authority on the topic. Confident voice, often with a manner. Words like “me”, “I” appear in different variants. Easy to manipulate by providing compliments and confirming he`s right. Once I watched a cartoon – Johnny Bravo it turned out – and Johnny was obtaining a girl. After talking about himself for too long, finally he goes – “But dear, let`s not talk about me, let`s talk about you! So, whatrrrs your opinion of me?” Body is correct, focused entirely on his speakers, he loves argumenting. Firm body position, planted. Gestures employed to emphasise he`s right, such as pointing to himself, open hand moving via a flight, a fist. Makes many pictures in frames, contrasted and content-specific. Often associated. ID will likely be only his. Kinesthetics often based on self-control and confidence. Paradoxally, he sometimes needs to recognise opinions of others. Uses active voice.
– External standards and authority – looks for external confirmation. Makes small, and distanced pictures of what he thinks and greater and closer in the others. Many pictures flow around his head, sometimes without any content, which may confuse him. They usually are often among the list of sources of information. Loads of ID of external origin, i.e. he hears other folks talking in his head with authoritative or authoritarian intonation. He loses rhythm while speaking with others, because tries to do both things at the same time – be up-time and speak with you together with in-time paying attention to ID. Uses external reference like “they said&rdquo ;.Could possibly be reactive. Less focused about the speaker, trances out often, his faces expresses conentration, reflexion or seeking something. He quotes a lot.
Options and Procedures
– Options – uses many verbs and action words. Values freedom. Loves possibilities and diversion, the greater to choose from the more effective he may feel. That`s why he can make many pictures in front of his face, these people allowing him to choose from different ideas. Other possibility is always that he may have a handful of framed matrix without any content, which he’d fulfill with options that may up. He accepts much above finds the opposite. He is fairly relaxed and confident – characteritsic because there’s always some other solution. Voice will be a bit slower than usually, sentences often ill-formed. I consider Carribbean life-style one big options MP – they awaken each day, there`s not too much to perform on the region, so they simply take it easy, it`s ok regardless of crops up. Face expresses looking and seeking possibilities, there`s no tension from the muscles, rather stable colours.
– Procedures person is characterised above through gestures they make. To find out the operation they require some form of internal strategy for organizing it – my observation is it`s almost always an inventory with plan or a set of small pictures grouped together within a sequence and arranged from left to right, up down etc. Quite often there`s ID which literally counts the steps. These men and women will say: “firstly, we…”, “then…”, “next…” and move their fingers accordingly or perhaps point with them reading steps from a list. Probably it`s probably the most easily spotted MP – pictures will probably be small, framed, using the written list, close thus to their faces, contrasted, rather 2D.
Are very specific, can drill you making use of their eyes, ask an awful lot of questions and don`t know what to do when the thought is chunked up too much. Then they lose safety or confidence, since there are no steps which could be followed. Can have an awful lot of ID is usually is faster compared to what they speak. ID can make them other questions or explain in confident manner what direction to go next. He listens pricesely for the speaker, faces him and pays attention. Doen`t trance greatly, spends most of his time uptime. Uses his hands continuously all around his body. Often procedure person combines it with chunking up – naturally his language is specific, precise and stuffed with expamples.
